How to Surrender to God When Life Is Hard and Your Calling Feels Hidden
A subtle clacking sound echoes from the black clock on the wall, and I stare into the ashen hues of winter outside. I sit by the window awaiting the roaring engine of the school bus. My calling feels humble, quiet, and hidden in this season, and I’m wondering just how to surrender to God in these hard days of mothering little ones.
Opening my Bible in search of encouragement, I find Jesus talking to a wealthy young man.
Jesus says to him, “If you wish to be complete, go and sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me”(Matthew 19:21).
As I often do when I read, I imagine myself in the place of the young man. I imagine the way the light reflects off the glimmering eyes of God-in-the-flesh. I imagine his intonation and my response.
The next verse depicts the rich young man’s response: But when the young man heard this statement, he went away grieving; for he was one who owned much property (Matthew 19:22).
How to Surrender to God in the Trenches of a Quiet Calling
I wonder what the Lord would ask me to give away if I approached him today.
Would he ask for my house? My car? All of my possessions?
Maybe he would ask for something to which I cling even more tightly. Perhaps he would ask about my concern over the way others perceive me.
It doesn’t take long for us to clench our fists around just about anything that offers the hope of a temporary reward. Ambition. Success. Prosperity. Perfectionism. Status. Appearance.
I stare at the face of the clock, and I know what I’m called to give away on this day. The Lord is calling me to give him my time. Not just an hour per day. Not just the three hours I deem “ministry time” each day, but all of it.
How would my life change if I gave God every minute of this day? Would I spend less time pursuing entertainment, chasing comfort, or folding laundry? I have no clue.
I silently vow to surrender my days to the Lord this week, and I have high hopes about reaching out to others, investing in younger women, and baking for neighbors.
Doing Something “Big” for God
Two days later, in the same chair, with the dusky twilight glowing through the window, I reflect on the past 48 hours of surrendering my time.
An hour after I prayed my prayer of surrender, my husband texted to say he’d be working all evening. I surrendered to a quiet evening in the house with energetic children.
The next morning, the little ones were awake well before daylight with wracking coughs and fevers. I canceled plans for the day and turned on humidifiers and cartoons.
Surrendering my time looked nothing like I expected.
I wanted to do something “big” for God.
Instead, the big thing was keeping a happy demeanor despite the disappointment of a night in the house without my helpful husband around.
I wanted to invest in some sort of community-centered ministry as I surrendered my days.
Instead, I held coughing children on the couch and watched Anne of Greene Gables.
And still, the invisible second-hand kept clicking on, counting time, reminding me that surrender is not so much about planning our lives as it is about checking our attitudes when God sends detours.
Maybe our attitudes in the crooked places are the best indicators of the totality of our surrender. #surrender #encounteringGod Click To TweetMaybe there were seasons when surrendering my time looked like staying up late with crying teens and going on week-long mission trips with dozens of high school students.
What Real Surrender Looks Like
Perhaps true surrender looks like doing the same humble work again and again in hidden places.
Maybe this is the ultimate kind of surrender.
And so, in the thick of the week of surrendering my time, I open to the passage in Matthew once more, and I read the words of Jesus to the rich young man, “If you wish to be complete . . .” (Matthew 19:21)
It seems I have read enough: If you wish to be complete, surrender to the hard and humble acts of service God is asking you to fulfill in this season, and keep following him. His heart work often takes place in the most unseen places.
And so, to all the tired moms, worn-out teachers, and stretched-thin CEOs: Don’t quit now. This is hard and humble work. It feels unseen, under-appreciated, and far too hidden much of the time. No one is saying thanks. You’re grinding it out and just doing what everyone expects from you.
But this is the place where God is transforming you into his image. This quiet place matters deeply. This is the place where you learn how to surrender to God in the valleys of life.
Keep doing the next thing, and keep doing it with your eyes fixed on him. This hard surrender is filled with eternal significance.
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